Hard Moments......

Now my little one started recognizing me and responds to me. It's so amazing when the baby smiles at you. I spent quality time with my baby over the weekend. It's already been a week I started working. It's very difficult for me to say bye bye to her every day. For the time being, I'm going home for lunch but this may not continue for long due to my work hours. I wish I can work from home. I can't continue like this. Other way, I'm feeling bad for not able to spend proper time with her. I don't want my baby to go thru what I went as a child. I remember my mom going to fields leaving us back home with our nannamma. We wished our mom stayed home with us by the time we come back from school. We wished to see her smiling face but this was really luxury for us. Both my parents used to work very hard to give us better life. I was sent to hostel at age of 9 and I'm on my own for most of the tasks. I used to look forward for vacation to go home. But as mom used to go to field, I had to spend time either alone or with friends which I hate. I want to be with mom all the time. My baby shouldn't face this and especially I don't want to regret later for not being with her. She's amazing kid, a lovely gal. After complaints and arguing with myself, I set my goal. By her 2, I should be home completely either work from home or start something. But by 5, I should be able to start something on my own. With my second kid, I want to be home completely. As a mother, I don't want to fail. As a daughter, sister I didn't fail.

I may not give her everything but I've to give her the stregth and confidence to get everything.
Love you Buddu....